Blame Shifters and Scapegoats
Problem:
I have seen this sinful dynamic in relationships when Biblically counseling with people. This problem is a knotted mess and often takes several sessions to work through. I wanted to write this down for my own reference when I have to teach on blame shifting and scapegoats. I hope what I have learned can be of help to fellow Biblical Counselors.
In Genesis chapter 3 we have the first recorded account of blame shifting that culminates in verse 12;
“Yes,” Adam admitted, “but it was the woman You gave me who brought me the fruit and I ate it.”
The first sin was a combination of rebellion, disobedience and lust for superiority seasoned with other self-serving motives. The second sin was trying to shift the blame of the sin on someone else, rather than taking ownership of it. We are definitely sons of Adam, because blame shifting is alive and thriving among humanity.
Let us map out the stakeholders in Genesis 3:12:
Blame Shifter: Adam
Scapegoat 1: God
Scapegoat 2: Eve
It is interesting that Adam knew enough not to lie. He admitted to his sin, but he quickly pivoted to try and find a home for his sin other than owning it himself. He blamed God and he blamed Eve (scapegoats). How much different human history would have been if Adam had shown courage, humbly confessed his sin and asked his Creator for mercy? We can only speculate, but history certainly would have launched much differently.
We are going to focus on each of the stakeholders in Genesis 3:12 individually to get a clearer understanding of the Biblical implications of this event.
Blame Shifter:
The root motivation of a Blame Shifter is cowardice. The Blame Shifter is afraid of being caught in sin. Instead of taking ownership of their sin they instinctively look for someone or something to stick their sin to so they do not have to own it. Notice how quickly Adam tried to stick his sin on God and then on Eve. A Blame Shifter will do whatever it takes to assign their sin to someone or something else even to the point of violence, bullying and self-righteousness.
Blame Shifters are often credited as being strong willed, but their fervency in shifting blame is a function of cowardice running in fear trying to push their sin anyplace they can rather than taking ownership of their own sin. Being strong willed has a noble connotation to it. The truth is there is nothing noble about cowardice.
The trap the Blame Shifter is caught in:
Cowardice and fear drives the Blame Shifter to seek a home for their sin.
They refusal to take ownership of their own sin.
With no ownership they are unable to repent.
With no repentance they can not seek forgiveness.
Unable to ask for forgiveness they are unable to receive forgiveness
Without receiving forgiveness there is no freedom from sin.
The Blame Shifter is in great danger. They have formed this false system for managing their sin that will fail them. Often as Blame Shifters age they become more and more bizarre in their acrobatics of trying to assign blame anyplace other than themselves.
I have witnessed Blame Shifters coming in for marital Biblical Counseling seeking to fix the other person. “If my spouse would ….. Then I would be much happier and all will be well.”, is often the generalized proposed solution to their problem. I have had a Blame Shifter say things like, “Yes. Yes, everything is my fault. Everything is always my fault.” As they roll their eyes and subtly point to their spouse. Blame Shifters have all kinds of tactics to accomplish their goals. Sadly they are blind to the trap that they are caught in, the trap of unrepentant and unforgiven sin. Without repentance there is no forgiveness of sin as Jesus pointed out in Matthew 13:14-15.
Cowards are in great danger. Revelation 21:8 says “but cowards who turn away from Me, and unbelievers, and the corrupt, and murders, and the immoral, and those who practice witchcraft, and idol worshipers, and all liars – their doom is in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur. This is the second death.” I have to watch myself and not grow angry at people who are trapped in the sin of blame shifting because of their cowardly nature. They are in a trap and the price of not getting freed from that trap is far higher than any of us would ever want to pay. Notice in the above verse it says “cowards who turn away from Me,”. That is what blame shifting is, it is a coward turning away from the forgiveness they can only receive through Jesus Christ.
Scapegoat:
In the modern day a scapegoat is a person whom the blame of another person’s sin is laid upon. In Leviticus 16 we learn about two goats. The first goat is a sin offering to be sacrificed to the LORD. The second goat is given the title of “scapegoat”.
Leviticus 16:21-22
He is to lay both of his hands on the goat’s head and confess over it all the sins and rebellion of the Israelites. In this way, he will lay the people's sins on the head of the goat; then he will send it out into the wilderness, led by a man chosen for this task. After the man sets it free in the wilderness, the goat will carry all the people’s sins upon itself into a desolate land.
I think there is enough going on in this passage concerning these two different goats that a good theologian could write a book on this dynamic alone. For now we are just going to focus on the purpose and responsibility of the scapegoat. The scapegoat had all of the sin’s of all of the Israelites placed on it. This was done because the Israelites could not bear the burden of their own sins. They had to get rid of their sin and at this time in history Jesus, who took away the sins of the world, had not lifted the burden of all sin on the cross yet. The scapegoat was a symbol of what was to come through Jesus Christ. Also we need to recognize that the scapegoat in this passage was not charged with committing sin itself, only that the goat was to have the burden of others sins placed on it.
God as the Scapegoat:
Adam in Genesis 3:12 not only tried to lay the burden of his sin on God, but he also claimed that God was responsible for the sin that was committed. God actually made a way through Jesus that God could bear Adam's sin, but God was not responsible for Adam’s sin. Only Adam could take rightful ownership of his own sin. This is where Adam failed. This is also where God burst forth with His unimaginable love and grace by being willing to bear Adam’s sin while not being responsible for causing Adam’s sin.
Man as the scapegoat:
Man is not capable of bearing the weight of the duty of a scapegoat. Eve in Genesis 3 was also guilty of sin and was no way capable of bearing her own sin let alone bearing Adam's sin also. This is why people, who submit to the role of scapegoat, are in such great pain and distress. They are completely unable to bear the weight of another person’s sin.
Some of the most pain filled, confused and exhausted people I have encountered in Biblical Counseling are people who have submitted to the role of scapegoat. They can have so many twisted thoughts to justify being in that role. They think things like; I deserve this, if only I did a little better, I am of little to no worth, to have peace I will bear this. They think they are somehow bearing these sins that only Jesus Christ can bear. They are self-deceived and hunger for freedom, but have no idea how to get free from this trap.
In Ezekiel 18 God clearly teaches that we are responsible for our own sin. We are not responsible for the sins that others commit.
Ezekiel 18:20
The one who sins is the one who dies. The child will not be punished for the parent’s sin, and the parent will not be punished for the child’s sin.
We can not bear other people’s sins. We also are completely unable to repent for another person’s sin. Only the person who commits the sin can repent of their sin and receive forgiveness. The Man scapegoat is a false messiah. They need to see the truth that they are doing no one a loving service by living this way. In fact they are a stumbling block to the Blame Shifter. The Man scapegoat is enabling the Blame Shifter to keep practicing their incapable management system for sin. The Man scapegoat must surrender this role and embrace the truth and freedom that only Jesus Christ can bear the weight of sin.
There is so much freedom and joy when you get to witness a Man scapegoat embrace their freedom from the burden of trying to bear other people’s sin, true joy! Their situation may not change, but they have joy in no longer trying to bear a burden they are completely incapable to carry.
How to fight the dynamics of this sin in Spiritual Warfare:
I would love to have a discussion with other Biblical Counselors to learn about their Spiritual Warfare battle strategies on this front. This is my current plan of attack:
Blame Shifter:
The freedom in Jesus' goal for the Blame Shifter is to get the Blame Shifter to take genuine ownership of their own sin. If they take ownership of their sin they can repent of their sin, seek forgiveness, receive forgiveness and step into the freedom that Jesus has already secured for them.
How do we accomplish this?
Isn’t that the problem? How do you get a person who believes this sin management system has served them well to abandon this failed system? We are to speak the truth in love. We apply the principles in 2 Timothy 2:23-26. This passage gives us steps to take, but also acknowledges that the only way a sinner is going to come to their senses is if God changes their heart.
Man scapegoat:
The freedom for the Man scapegoat comes from embracing the truth that they can not bear the burden of other’s sin or even their own sin. Acknowledge and step into a primary love relationship with Jesus and rejoice in His willingness and ability to bear the sins of the world. If they step into this truth, they are going to experience great joy. With that joy and renewed confidence in the goodness of Jesus, encourage them to start praying for the Blame Shifter in their life. Pray specifically that the Blame Shifter will grow in courage and be willing to take ownership of their own sin. If the Blame Shifter owns their own sin, now they can repent of their sin, ask forgiveness, receive forgiveness and experience true freedom that can only be had in Jesus.
